London 2012 Opening Ceremony: A lesson in world fashion, and geography


The Opening Ceremony of the Games of the XXX Olympiad were nothing short of a spectacle.  Seeing pictures on Twitter, Facebook, and the greater internet prior to NBC's official primetime coverage was exciting and heartbreaking, all rolled into one.  Post viewing, I have come to the conclusion that I am not British enough to fully "get it," but that's ok.  I still thoroughly enjoyed myself.  I was really taken by the Industrial Revolution, and obviously this part:

I have no clue what is happening here, but I like it.

Let's be real, though.  As much fun as the show itself was, the Parade of Nations was where the excitement and poor clothing choices (coughUnitedStatescough) were at, not to mention a solid educational opportunity.  Who's ready for a geography quiz???  Below, find my best and worst dressed of the Parade of Nations:



This is what I imagine it would look like if the cast of Mad Men went to the Olympics.  I love this.


The patriotism via color palate is unparalleled here.  Granted, they had an excellent color palate to work with, but they really did it well.  I like the skirt length (pay attention, Ralph Lauren), as well as the varied green and yellow bottoms.  Super snazzy!


Czech Republic

Does it rain a lot in the Czech Republic?  Or is this a nod to the unpleasant weather London is known for?  Either way, umbrellas and rain boots are a bold move for the Opening Ceremony.  As are those leggings.  I really love everything about this in a slightly ironic way, but would actually probably wear every piece.



It really pains me to say this.  I really like everything else about Canada, and judging solely on the jackets, they've done well.  However.  I CAN NOT HANDLE the combination of red and khaki.  They look like they all work at Canadian outposts of Target.  I understand thinking that red and khaki will look good together, just know that it won't.


Ok, I Googled it and the red poppy is the national flower of Poland.  However.  Florals don't help anyone.  I would know.  I spent a great deal of my childhood in floral unitards.  Also, the dip-dye effect of the red is not working.


There is no way NOT to look like a total tool in this outfit.  Here are my issues, starting from the top.  A beret???  We are not France.  We are not IN France.  I guess we're close to France, being in London, but why does that warrant a beret?  Must we wear a hat???  The scarf I'm actually into, but I am upset that it is $58.  Sometimes people with no athletic ability whatsoever want to feel like Olympians, too.  Or have a cute scarf for the 4th of July.  The skirt.  Lord, heavens, the SKIRT!!!!  Who approved that length?  In conjunction with the inappropriately tall socks and matching white shoes, it is too much and makes the women look like stumpy messes.  Which they are not.  They area world class athletes.  Finally, in general I find there to be a serious lack of red.  This outfit would have looked better with red pants/skits.  Please take note for next time.

If you can't get enough of American athletes looking ridiculous at the Opening Ceremony, check out this handy slideshow.

For more opinions and pictures, check out this piece from Yahoo Sports via, as well as this piece from a website I have never heard of.  You can also view a hefty selection of pictures here.



  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

  2. One, I love that in the linked US slide show almost all of our athletes are holding, and actively using their iphones.

    Second, SO RIGHT about Czech Republic. Cheeky went wrong in this context.


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